‘My colleague used me for sex – I thought we had a future but he’s ignoring me’

A colleague used me for sex and now I’m being blanked.

I thought he and I had a future together; that I meant something to him. But he’s ignoring my messages.

More than once I’ve spotted him turning on his heels in the corridor in order to avoid me.

The other day I ran after him in the car park and he just jumped into his car and sped away.

Later he told my mate that he must have had his headphones in. But he knew I was there.

He and I got together last November. I saw him nursing a large one in the local pub and asked if he fancied some company.

He blubbed that his wife had left the country. She’d gone to see her sick mother and he didn’t know if she was coming back.

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He said she was selfish and cruel and he wished he’d never married her.

One drink led to another and he ended up coming back to mine for sex.

The next night he was waiting for me in reception and we went on a proper date.

I thought I was seeing a newly single man, so started cooking him meals, washing his shirts and welcoming him into my bed.

We had some glorious sex all over my flat and I assumed he loved me. But then his mother-in-law died, his wife came home and he dropped me like a stone.

I got one text telling me that he’d got it all wrong; that his wife did still love him – now I’m his guilty little secret.

He can’t even bring himself to look me in the eye. I don’t deserve this and don’t know what to do.


  • 'We used to have fantastic sex but now my germ-obsessed girl won't go near me'

JANE SAYS: This tricky individual used you.

While his wife nursed her dying mother, he made himself comfortable in your bed.

He led you to believe that you were in a relationship. You invested time, love and money while he filled his boots. Nasty.

Now his wife is back and you find yourself angry and frustrated. There’s no doubt in my mind he abused your trust for his own ends.

He couldn’t be bothered to look after himself so leeched off you.


  • 'My girlfriend can't stand the fact that I make more money than she does'

Do you send him a bill for food and laundry services? Or do you accept that he is a Grade A rat and turn the other cheek?

Please consider your mental health and energy levels and chalk him down as a loser.

I know it doesn’t seem fair that he should ‘get away’ with treating you like a skivvy, but is he really worth bothering with?

He’s shown his true colours. Get on with your work, give him a wide berth and enjoy watching him squirm at work.

Your best form of ‘revenge’ is success, so let him go, excel at everything you do and leave him behind.

If anything, wish his poor wife the very best of British because, not only has she lost her mother, but she’s lumbered with the likes of him.

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