Don’t be that person! Etiquette expert reveals WORST sins you can commit when visiting another person’s home… so how many are YOU guilty of?
- Florida etiquette expert Jackie Vernon-Thompson weighs in on guest faux pas
- Should you be replacing an empty toilet roll or putting your feet on furniture?
- And Jackie reveals why asking to use your host’s shower gel is ‘improper’
Don’t make yourself at home!
That’s the advice a Florida etiquette expert is offering up when it comes to being a guest at another person’s house if you want a repeat invite.
After DailyMail.com’s Jaci Stephen wrote about a rude visitor turning over her toilet paper roll in a major faux pas, FEMAIL has asked Jackie Vernon-Thompson, founder of Inside Out School of Etiquette, to weigh in on the most common mistakes you could be making when you’re staying over at a home that isn’t yours.
Jackie said when you’re staying a someone else’s place you should always be concerned and seek out what was expected of you as a visitor.
Should you be replacing an empty toilet roll? Etiquette expert Jackie Vernon-Thompson weighs in and this – and other etiquette sins you could be committing
‘People living in every home establish their own culture. What is acceptable in my home, may be prohibited in your home,’ she told DailyMail.com.
‘Keep in mind, a person’s home is their safe haven and a place where they feel they have the control and it is their relaxed environment.
‘When you are invited to inhabit their home for any length of time, you must attempt to understand the culture of the home to prevent offense or inappropriate conduct.’
To help you out, Jackie has laid out her advice below on eight different scenarios to make sure you don’t commit an etiquette sin, from putting your feet on the furniture and not replacing an empty toilet paper roll to using shower products and leaving dirty bedsheets.
Shoes on or shoes off? It’s always better to ask than be sorry
Jackie recommends people ask their host if they would like you to remove your shoes or not as a sign of respect before you enter their house.
‘If they request that you remove them, be happy to do so and place them on the side or they may have a shoe rack where you may sit them,’ the expert says.
‘I’ve visited homes where removal of shoes is either their culture or preference. They provide booties or brand new socks for me to place on my feet for my comfort. That is a suggestion for anyone who prefers their guests to remove their shoes.
‘In that home there may be a baby who crawls on the floor. Consider the fact that the germs from your shoes will most likely be left on the floor and will be transferred to the baby. That’s not good.
‘They may even have an older child. Keep in mind children like to sit on the floor at any given time. Even if the host does not ask, if you know they have young children, consider the child or children and remove your shoes voluntarily – that speaks volumes.’
Shoes on or off? It’s always polite to ask your host when you arrive at their home
Replace the roll! Don’t leave the next person caught with their pants down with no toilet paper
If you’re staying for an extended time, you might be faced with an empty toilet roll.
In this scenario, Jackie says it is proper etiquette to replenish the supply.
‘Usually there is an extra roll in the cupboards or somewhere to allow you to replenish it without alerting them,’ she said.
‘If you have used the last bit and there is not a new roll in the bathroom, after washing your hands, simply ask for a new roll to hang.
‘Don’t ever make the mistake of leaving it empty because it is not your home. That is not proper etiquette at all.
Jackie also addresses another debate that probably plagues households: ‘Men, please be sure to place the toilet seat back down considering that someone may come behind you who will have to sit.’
Don’t put your feet on the furniture! It’s a ‘huge no-no,’ expert says
This is where Jackie warns guests not to get too comfortable.
Even if you see your host with their feet on the furniture, it is not an invite to do it yourself, the etiquette expert warns.
‘If you find yourself lounging a bit and enjoying a great conversation or a show on the television, please do not become so comfortable that you place your feet on the couch or the coffee table. That is a huge no-no, Jackie told DailyMail.com.
‘Keep your feet on the floor or if on a La-Z-Boy, sit appropriately as you elevate your feet. Never feel it is quite fine placing your feet on their couch even if you see them doing it.
‘Keep in mind, you are a guest, which means you are to care for their property and furniture as if they were your own. Refraining from placing your feet on their couch, is one way to express gratitude for the accommodations.’
It’s a huge no-no! Don’t ever put your feet on the furniture even if you see your host do it
Avoid those pesky watermarks and use a coaster!
By asking for a coaster, you’re simply saying to your host that you care about their furniture – and they will no doubt appreciate your thoughtfulness, Jackie says.
‘While enjoying those relaxed experiences in their home, you more than likely will have a few drinks of water, juice, or even wine,’ she told DailyMail.com.
‘Never place the glass or cup directly on their furniture, especially if it is wood. Keep in mind, water on wood that is not immediately removed or dried, leaves a ring on the wood.
‘Simply request a coaster, demonstrating you wish not to stain their furniture. That communicates to them that you care about maintaining their items. I am sure they will appreciate it. You’ve just earned brownie points, my friend.’
Why you should never face glasses or cups in the cupboard
When staying for an extended period of time, you might offer to unpack or fill your host’s dishwasher.
You will likely have to place the cups or glasses back into their rightful places and Jackie advises that they should never face down.
Hygiene is a big reason why you should never place your cups or glasses downwards in the cupboard
‘There are a couple reasons it is recommended not to do that. When you place the glass downward where the rim is touching the surface, you subject the person who will drink from it to being exposed to any bacteria that may have been on the surface where it was laid because they will place their mouth on the rim. That’s not a good thing,’ she explained.
‘Another reason is that when the glass or cup is downward, it becomes susceptible to the rim being chipped, which can cause someone to cut their lip if they do not notice the chip at the rim when drinking from it.’
Using your host’s shower gel is the ‘epitome of improper etiquette’
Jackie says it’s ‘forbidden’ to use your host’s shower gel, shampoo or conditioner. Even if you ask, it puts them in an awkward position when they want to say ‘no’
Have you ever forgotten your toiletries bag and reached for the shower gel you see hanging out in your host’s bathroom?
Well, according to Jackie, you’ve committed one of the ultimate etiquette sins.
Pictured is etiquette expert Jackie Vernon-Thompson
‘As a guest, it is forbidden to use their shower gel, moisturizer, shampoo, conditioner, or any other product in their shower or bathroom,’ she said.
‘You must travel with your personal hygiene products whenever you plan any overnight trips. Using their products is unacceptable and the epitome of improper etiquette.
‘Instead, take the time to pack what you use daily to ensure you neither have to use their products or request permission to use them. That would be a huge faux pas that you don’t want to make.’
Even if you do ask to use your host’s products you are putting them in an ‘uncomfortable position’ because they don’t want to be the villain.
‘If they wish to say, “no,” they feel they must say, “yes,” because obviously you do not have your own. Not a good look,’ Jackie explained.
‘Consider this, would you like an overnight guest to use your personal hygiene items? I’m sure you are shaking your head, “Absolutely not!” Then, please don’t place the host in such an awkward position. Be prepared!”
Clean up after yourself: Remove the bed linen you’ve slept on
Jackie highly recommends removing the bed linen you’ve slept on and offer to replace it with clean sheets when you depart.
The etiquette expert said this showed you wished to clean up after yourself.
‘[It shows] you are not expecting the host to do it and be subjected to touching, more than necessary, the sheets you rolled around in and perhaps soiled while sleeping,’ she added.
‘Changing the linen or offering to change them is proper etiquette and considerate.’
It’s highly recommended to remove your slept-in bedsheets when you leave
Go the extra mile and leave a small parting gift as a sign of appreciation
It’s always nice to show a token of your appreciation and Jackie advises leaving a thank you card or note after your stay.
‘If you have not discussed monetary compensation, you should go as far as surprising them by offering monetary compensation for the stay,’ she said.
‘They can then refuse it or humbly accept it with a smile.’
Jackie said it was not difficult or stressful to be a ‘respectful, helpful and grateful guest’ in another person’s home, just be considerate.
‘Put yourself in the host’s shoes. How would you like a guest in your home to operate? Answer that question, then elevate the expectations [two times] more because it is not about you,’ she added.
‘It is about non-verbally and verbally expressing to the host that you appreciate their hospitality and them opening their doors to you. It is about being appreciative and conducting yourself appropriately.’
Source: Read Full Article
