My husband refused to let my friend and her child stay with us after her partner kicked her out – I feel terrible but he says we ‘shouldn’t get involved’
- Woman took to Mumsnet to share concerns over her husband’s attitude
- Many said he was cruel and insensitive, with some labelling him a ‘bully’
- Read more: The man I’ve started seeing hasn’t asked me any questions in DAYS
A woman has sparked a debate after asking if her husband is being unreasonable for not allowing a desperate colleague to stay with them after she escaped a potentially abusive relationship.
In the post on parenting forum Mumsnet, the woman shared how a colleague turned up on her doorstep with her 12-year-old daughter pleading to stay for one night.
She claimed her husband refused, arguing they shouldn’t get involved – and she took to the internet to ask if he was right.
However, most posters slammed him – saying he was cruel and heartless.
And others said he could at least offer to pay for the woman and her child to sleep in a hotel for a night so they would be safe.
The couple argued about whether or not to let the woman stay with her 12-year-old daughter (stock image)
In the original post, the woman explained how a colleague had turned up at her house 30 minutes earlier crying with her daughter.
She wrote: ‘She had her bags and stuff in her car. She was asking if she could stay the night as her husband has kicked her out after she said she didn’t feel safe with him anymore.
‘She asked if she can sleep at ours for the night. Before I could even say anything DH jumped in and said no.
‘I would probably have said yes as we have enough room.’
She explained that the crying woman then drove to a coffee shop with her daughter and added she wanted to at least meet her colleague for a coffee to find out more.
But she added: ‘My DH is telling me not to go as I apparently “shouldn’t get involved”.
‘There’s no way he’ll let her sleep here tonight if he doesn’t even want me to go to a coffee shop with her and check she’s ok.
‘What do I do? Am I being unreasonable to think DH is in the wrong here and is being insensitive to her?’
Many Mumsnet viewers agreed with her – slamming the woman’s husband and voicing sympathy for the fleeing woman.
Many Mumsnet users thought the husband was being cruel and heartless to not let the woman and child even come in the house
One wrote: ‘I really don’t understand why your dear husband is being so hostile towards a vulnerable woman and pre-teen. His attitude seems really odd.
‘At the very least he could agree to let them stay for just one night, then ask that your colleague looks into refuges in the morning.’
Another wrote: ‘Wow. Is your Dear Husband always this heartless? That would make me re-evaluate what kind of person I had married to be honest.’
Another wrote: ‘You have a nasty husband.’
While a fourth wrote: ‘You husband is being ridiculous. Of course they should be able to stay.
‘If he is refusing, then use your husband’s money to pay for a hotel so they are safe.’
The woman then explained that she was going to go for a coffee with the fleeing woman – even though her husband advised against it, saying she shouldn’t ‘get involved’.
She added that it was 9.30pm which caused further backlash from Mumset users.
One wrote: ‘Your husband doesn’t get to refuse. Unless he wants to be labelled also abusive.’
Another wrote: ‘So now your husband has imprisoned you in your house? So now you are both in abusive relationships and the two men are sticking up for each other it seems.’
The woman’s last post was that she was going to meet the desperate woman for a coffee, and that she would let her sleep at theirs tonight if needed.
But others voiced sympathy with the husband.
Others had sympathy with the husband, saying they would also be wary about letting a relative stranger stay in their house
One wrote: ‘Na (sic) I am with your husband. Don’t let randos who are not in a fit state of mind in your house.’
Another wrote: ‘I would be helping her to a hotel, but I would be very cautious having her in my home if there was even the slightest chance she was followed or her husband might know where I lived.
‘I wouldn’t be inviting trouble near my home where my children live, but I would support her in other ways.’
A third agreed, writing: ‘I have children, there is no way I would let one of my husband’s random colleagues stay in my home while the children are here.’
A fourth wrote: ‘I’m pretty sure I know what he’s thinking.
‘I was threatened by a husband of my friend when she run to me and I let her stay. Hard situation.’
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