No question of whether Harry will join Royal Family for Christmas

EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Omid Scobie’s book resolves any dilemma over whether Harry and Meghan will join the rest of the Royal Family for Christmas

At least Scooby Doo’s Endgame resolves any dilemma over the King and Queen’s Christmas walk to church. 

With Harry and Meghan highly unlikely to be pulling festive crackers at Sandringham, Charles and Camilla along with William and Kate won’t have to pose for seasonal photos with the relatives from California. 

A walk to church on Christmas morning with the brothers pretending all is well would be a step too far for the Prince of Wales. 

It was tried in 2018 when William and Kate had to cancel Christmas Day with her family (Carole Middleton had done an interview about how she had decorated rooms for the children complete with their own trees) to put on a show of unity with H&M. 

It fooled no one.

With Harry and Meghan highly unlikely to be pulling festive crackers at Sandringham, Charles and Camilla along with William and Kate won’t have to pose for seasonal photos with the relatives from California

A walk to church on Christmas morning with the brothers pretending all is well would be a step too far for the Prince of Wales (Pictured: Harry and Meghan in 2021) 

Does Charles have his shoelaces ironed as claimed by Omid Scobie? Not according to those who make his bespoke footwear at Church’s factory. 

His laces are round, not flat, so ironing them would serve little purpose.

Does Charles have his shoelaces ironed as claimed by Omid Scobie (pictured)? Not according to those who make his bespoke footwear at Church’s factory.

How will Sir Paul McCartney, confirmed for the sequel to classic rock band movie spoof This Is Spinal Tap, cope as a thespian? 

Richard Lester, directing The Beatles in A Hard Day’s Night and Help!, wasn’t impressed with Macca’s acting saying: ‘He was so enthusiastic, he perhaps tried too hard.’ Admits Paul: ‘I think, “I could be such a great actor.” Then they say ‘Action!’ and turn the camera on, and I go “uh-uh-uh-uh…” I just don’t think I’m a natural.’ Wasn’t Ringo available? 

Meanwhile, Ringo’s son Zak Starkey, these days drumming for The Who, dismisses fans’ calls for him to form a band with John Lennon’s son Sean and Macca’s son James. 

‘If we had spent three years sleeping on flea infested mattresses in the back room of a Hamburg club, it might have chemistry,’ he says. 

‘But we have been swaddled in silken robes in houses so big that it’s too far to go and make a piece of toast.’

Ringo’s son Zak Starkey (pictured), these days drumming for The Who, dismisses fans’ calls for him to form a band with John Lennon’s son Sean and Macca’s son James

Sharon Osbourne condemns Russell Brand, remarking: ‘I wasn’t surprised. Not at all. An extreme, outrageous person. I saw the documentary about him and thought, “How the hell did anybody get away with that behaviour?”‘

Change of tune? During his 2009 heyday Sharon admitted to having a crush on Brand, announcing: ‘Oh, he’s a sexy old thing.’

Sharon Osbourne condemns Russell Brand, remarking: ‘I wasn’t surprised. Not at all. An extreme, outrageous person’

Invited to Sir Ben Kingsley’s dressing room shortly after he’d won an Oscar for Gandhi, Ade Edmondson asked: ‘Where’s the tea and biscuits?’ 

Ben pointed to the end of the room where his spot-lit Oscar stood. 

‘He said, “There. There you are”,’ recalled Ade. Dismissing him, Ben added: ‘Thank you very much for coming.’

Reflecting on Angela Rippon, 79, recently being eliminated from Strictly Come Dancing, Ab Fab star Jennifer Saunders now cheekily quips: ‘I’m not sure how many more times her legs could have gone to ten to six – they may never tell the time again.’

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